Jman's first book

A couple days ago I caught Jman doing something I'd never seen him do before. He was trying to staple pieces of paper together. I've never seen Jman use a stapler before. I've seen him use tape, and I've occasionally had him use glue sticks. But I can't recall a time when I had him stapling anything, or when he was fixing pages together. But there he was--working very hard to staple a stack of pages together. Even funnier was the fact that he'd cut all the pieces of paper out of a spiral bound notebook. It seemed he destroyed one notebook to try to make another book.

Anyway, left to his own timing and his own devices, Jman has recently begun making great use of both scissors, and now, without instruction, he's using staplers as well. (Or he's trying to. He had almost too many pages for the little stapler we have, so I had to help him actually get the staples through the paper once I found him. He was trying hard though!)

Jman didn't do anything with his stapled pages right away. Just assembling the pages seemed project enough for him at that time. It was later that I discovered the larger project he was working on. He was drawing the cover page for a book he was making, modeled loosely on a couple of 'real books' he has.


At first he only did the cover page, then set the project aside once again. This is rather unusual drawing behavior for Jman. He typically draws on a page, then draws on the next, and then the next, and then the next. He can go through a 70 page one subject notebook in no time. (Good thing I stocked up on them one year when they were six cents each for back-to-school!) But Jman wasn't filling in the pages on this project of his at lightning speed. Just the cover, and then he set it aside.

Today I noticed he has added a couple more pages to his book. I honestly was expecting to find the first couple pages copied from his real My First 500 Words book, but that was not the case. Instead, the first picture resembles a drawing from a different book, and I'm not sure where the next drawing is from. However, that next drawing spans two pages. Another interesting variation, because Jman usually only draws on the front side of a piece of paper, not the back side. To draw a picture spanning two pages with writing on the back side of a page is a new thing for him.


Now, why do I share all these odd little observations? I suppose because I just find it absolutely fascinating. Even left to his own devices, Jman continues to learn and discover and create and grow in new and surprising and exciting ways. I have to work very hard to resist the impulse to jump in there and start taking his projects over, trying to direct him and 'make the most of' his projects. Either I could be teaching him more skills or academicky stuff, or I could be usurping his projects and interests to try to work on social and communication skills.

But when I resist the urge to take over, I'm realizing that he perhaps learns and grows even more. For example, rather than taking over his book-making project, I stepped in and helped him with the stapling problem. He just couldn't squeeze that little stapler hard enough to get it through the number of pages he had. I noticed, I stepped in, I offered help, which he accepted. And then I stepped back out and let him keep doing his thing when he didn't need me anymore. Perhaps that is an even better way of working on the relationship and communication skills--gradually teaching him that I'm interested and there when he needs or wants me, but also that I'm not going to come in and take over and ruin all the fun.

I've contemplating maybe doing a little more 'parallel' with him. If he's making a book, maybe I could make a book too. Not trying to take his over, not trying to direct his project, but just maybe finding a non-controlling way to 'share the experience' a little more deeply with him. Just as he borrowed my idea of folding the paper when I made a card and he made a DVD case, maybe we could both get some creative juices flowing and share and communicate more with some other parallel projects. I've even wondered if his book-making project stemmed in some way from the paper DVD case he made. It's an interesting thought.

Anyway, Jman is making a book, little by little, and that's a new thing for him. I wonder how long he'll continue with this project of his, I wonder how it will ultimately turn out, and I wonder about maybe creating my own parallel book to see what comes of that sharing. And increasingly I'm more and more comfortable with relaxing and 'unschooling' Mr. Autism.